How can students manage studies during a parent’s illness when their concentration and focus are mainly on how soon their loved one will recover?

Children grow up in what seems like a split second. As they move from preschool to middle school and into their teens, it may feel like they need their parents less. But more often than not, this is only their independence and growing confidence manifesting. Parents hold a spot in children’s hearts that nothing – not time, not other people – can replace.

No wonder then that a parent’s ill health can be a miserable time for children. They may struggle to focus on their schoolwork, which becomes a problem if they have significant tests and milestones on the horizon. Kids may be unwilling to attend classes or not complete assignments when a parent is undergoing a serious health scare.

As educators and parents, let us find a few ways to help students strike a balance in these difficult times.

#1 Don’t Keep Children in the Dark

Parents wish to protect their children from bad news, especially if it is the failing health of a close family member. However, not explaining the situation to a school-going child may only worsen things. Without trusted knowledge, the student may conjure worst-case scenarios, dreading leaving their house.

A new study found that kids as young as 8 or 9 can recognize sick faces. These skills improve with age. So, if you deny anything is amiss, they may get more scared as they wonder why their parents had to lie. Some small children may develop an avoidant behavior upon perceiving that a parent is unwell, which can be upsetting for both.

Instead, it is better to have an age-appropriate talk about the current situation. Child development experts recommend preparing a script with simple, easy-to-understand language. 

For example, young children may not benefit much from excessive detail about the condition or its medication. However, they must know that the parent is taking medicine and getting a doctor’s help. It tells their impressionable mind that their loved one is getting better.

The conversation will be much more distressing if the underlying health condition is incurable or terminal. One can focus on enjoying the present day and discussing how doing well at school will delight the ailing parent. Beyond schoolwork, conversations like these also support a child’s mental wellness.

The Toronto Star featured the life-affirming experience of a sclerosis patient who had to discuss terminal illness with young children. Although it was undoubtedly heartbreaking, the parents found it encouraged the kids to participate in therapy and feel connected to the extended family. 

Based on the severity of the disease, parents can consider partnering with professional counselors and grief organizations. They will help you develop concrete steps and communication pointers to help students manage studies during a parent’s illness.

#2 Involve Children in Active Caregiving

When a parent is ill, empathetic children may wish only to remain by their side. Studies take a backseat. First, kudos for raising sensitive kids who want to do their all for you. Second, you can build a balance by assigning them actionable steps to help manage the illness. Make it clear that they must utilize the remaining time for their schoolwork.

For example, children can help fix simple meals for their younger siblings and ensure the ailing parent gets the necessary doctor-recommended exercise, like walking for 15 minutes every morning. 

It is also vital to reassure kids that the family as a unit is doing everything to facilitate a quicker recovery. This reassurance will help students manage their studies during a parent’s illness. Diagnoses like cancer can be particularly heartbreaking for children due to their connotations of hopelessness. 

Unfortunately, these scenarios have become more common. Even a seemingly harmless contraceptive injection can raise risks of brain tumors, as evidenced by the Depo-Provera lawsuit. New research has found that this birth control injection, manufactured by Pfizer, can also cause meningioma. 

How can families be prepared for such sudden situations? Teenage kids may also worry about the costs of treatment. Informing them about how you will manage funds, life insurance, and savings can ease their minds.

#3 Be Open to Flexible Study Schedules

A family health emergency may require students to make alternate arrangements for turning in submissions or attending classes. For example, a student pursuing higher studies in another city may wish to take a semester off to be with their parents as they convalesce. 

As parents, it is best to be flexible about such arrangements and allow children to follow their hearts. Being overly stringent about rules and timelines may not go down well with sensitive kids who are already anxious and fearful. Instead, parents can help kids discuss with their school counselors and draw up alternative schedules that allow them some breathing space.

Encouraging children to study with peers or seek help from homeroom teachers can also be a helpful strategy for adverse circumstances. Roping in the extended family or even trustable neighbors can give kids a supportive atmosphere. These sessions let children share their feelings and worries with others. It benefits kids who tend to get withdrawn under stress. 

Parents can also arrange study sessions at home if the kids are unwilling to venture out. Online learning communities that use communicative technologies can be a blessing. A Frontiers study found that such sessions boost learning outcomes and alleviate anxiety. An opportunity to share their worries with others benefits kids who get withdrawn under stress.  

They say childhood is the most wonderful phase of life – a period when the mind is free of stress and fears. Unfortunately, some circumstances can make these golden days tough, subjecting children to emotional and mental hardships. 

Balancing studies can be challenging when young minds are preoccupied. Adults must proactively help students manage their studies during their parent’s illness. Working together can help parents and educators support kids in navigating this turbulence.